Nude photo texts and iPhones switched for fruit in the Apple Crime Blotter

But everyone keeps telling me police are divine saints who do no harm???????

Also the a find My story is funny how they used a stolen iPad to find the location but couldn’t actually find the iPad that led them there. He must have hid it good! This is why you need a new iPhone to help you find your items. It has accurate tracking down to the foot. 

Beats said:

But everyone keeps telling me police are divine saints who do no harm???????

Also the a find My story is funny how they used a stolen iPad to find the location but couldn’t actually find the iPad that led them there. He must have hid it good! This is why you need a new iPhone to help you find your items. It has accurate tracking down to the foot. 

...and in 9/9 of these stories, the police are the ones that collect evidence of the wrongdoers, including the Trooper that did wrong, and was fired, convicted, and has two years of probation.  Police aren't divine saints, and I have been on both sides of the police story, as a person needing the police and someone that had the police called on me, which leads me to your second point...

On 9/11/19, my stuff was stolen from where I work, and here's the synopsis of what happened.
4:50pm - Found my backpack emptied, my work laptop askew (it was tethered to the desk), and my stuff gone, including an aviation headset, my iPad, and later, I found out charge cords and my wireless mouse (the nano dongle was still in my laptop, so it was evident it was a "grab and go" activity.  Note that this is a open area of a factory, with lots of visibility.

5:10pm - After calling the security at my company, and filing a report with them, I called the local police, and they said they'd "send someone over to take a report."  I told them I'd wait outside the gates of the company, so to make it easier.  I took pictures of the area with my work phone, where the stuff was stolen.

5:12pm - on my way to my car, I realized that my iPad was cellular, and I could use Find Friends on it, and discovered it was about 2 miles from where I used to live, in an apartment building.

5:13pm - called 911 to let the police know I was on my way over to where the iPad was, as it hadn't moved.  I checked a few times on the way over, and it didn't move, so I felt safe in the assumption that my stuff was in the apartment building.  I was told not to "get my stuff back" and "someone would be with me in a 'few minutes'"

6:00pm - arrived at the place where my stuff was, and parked outside a mini-mart.  I was thirsty, so I went inside to get something to drink.  After returning to the car, did another Find Friends to see that the iPad had moved to the corner of the street, where I saw a car with two people, a large well built 6'2" man and a woman, approximately 5'2" and about 110lbs at a car with a bunch of backpacks in it.  I called 911 to let them know that I think that these are the people, and asked where the police were.  They told me they were busy, and would get back to me "real soon".

6:45pm - my phone is going dead, and after the two people going through all of the backpacks, they decide to push the car to a gas pump.  I move my car to where they were, and get out of the car to get a charge cord.  I was pretending to be on the phone arguing with my wife about how she beat me up, so that when the police come to talk to me, it doesn't seem like they're there for these two.  I walk around talking loudly about how she threw hot soup on me and beat me with the pans, and how I'm afraid to come home.  I did all of this while taking pictures of these two.  Note to self:  Next time you try this, do a video.  All of the pictures looked like "bigfoot pictures".

6:50pm - on the way out of the store, the young woman stops me and asks for gas money.  This is too funny.  I apologize to her, and told her I didn't have any cash.  Then I yell into the phone that "this isn't my girlfriend.  You cheated on me!!!"  The young woman apologizes, and I cover the phone and apologize to her, and that "she (my wife) is crazy."

7:00pm I call 911 again from the car, and let them know that they're out of gas, and if they get there, they can get them.  I'm told that the police will get back to me "right away".

7:15pm  They get money, and start pumping gas.  I call 911, who patches me through to the police, who then interrogate me:  
"Did you see the things that were stolen?"  
"No, I was told not to confront them."  
"Well, if you didn't see it, file a police report."  
"You know if you come to me, I can make the iPad say, "Arrest these people, Officer Worthless (not his real name)", but I thought if I made it make all kinds of noises, then the tracking feature would be rendered useless when they tossed it out of the car."  Wait... they're leaving."
"Do not follow them"
"They're going the same direction as the place I live.  And look, my iPad is tracking along with them.  Who'd have thought?"
"Well, you need to file a police report."
"You're worthless.  You have the easiest crime to solve, and you just sat on your a@#$ when you could have done something about it.  I'll file the report, and have a wonderful night."
"Well. " *click*

8:00pm  I get home, and go online to file the police report, and discover my flight log, with about $12,000 in flight records is missing.  This increases the value of my items to >$15,000 ($12000 for the logbook information, $1500 for the headset, and $1500 for the iPad)

9:00pm I call the police department with this information, and they tell me to come down there.  I ask if Officer Worthless is there, and they tell me he has gone home for the night.  

10:00pm The police get the information from me directly, and it turns out my iPad is dutifully reporting that it is there, about 2 miles from my home.

11:00pm  The police let me know they have my stuff, and I can pick it up at 4am the next morning.  I am asked about a computer they had from my company, and I tell them I'll look into it.

4:00am  I go to the police station and get my stuff back

6:00am  I go to work and become the stuff of legend.  Everyone laughs at the detail I took.

The guy was arrested on possession of stolen property, possession of controlled substances, and possession of a stolen vehicle.  In gratitude, they returned all my stuff unharmed, and included things I didn't realize were stolen, but were mine.  I didn't get anything that wasn't mine, and didn't notice anything else missing.

about a month later, a detective calls me, and after the initial interview, starts laughing as we are going through the report I gave them.  He asked what I did, and understood my frustration when he read back the 911 call.  He said this was one of the easiest cases he had to put together.

Note to AI:  I can give you all of the case details, if you like.

AppleInsider said:

One Connecticut police department is recommending that car owners place AirTags inside their cars in order to avoid car thefts. According to Patch, the area has seen a large recent uptick in car thefts, and the AirTags are seen as a way to mitigate the problem. 

Citizens are also advised to lock their cars and otherwise secure valuable items.

You'd think a police department spokesperson would learn to speak more precisely.

Simply adding an AirTag to a car will do precisely nothing to "avoid theft".  It might allow easier tracking, assuming a sufficiently well hidden AirTag's signal can penetrate a car's frame (seems plausible to me, but I might have to try that with my one AirTag), but given the nature of the safeguards Apple has put in place to prevent stalking, that seems unlikely for more than a short period of time.  Maybe.

Apple was right to downplay the theft detection possibilities of AirTag.